A little story called life.. · The little things

A little too late

My husband sent me a link this afternoon via email. The subject of the email read “Too little, too late”. My heart dropped as I opened the link and the news report from ABC opened up and the first word my eye caught was “uterus”.

I feel sick to my stomach thinking that there could soon be the possibility of a successful uterine transplant in the U.S for several reasons. I can’t pin point exactly how I feel about it, but at least I know that I care.

My heart sinks thinking of all the time I’ve spent mourning the loss of my child bearing ability. The possibility of reversing my physical impairment is something I can’t quite accept. This may be a crude comparison, but I have already lost that part of me and I can’t imagine how I would feel if I got it back; especially if there were complications post surgery. There’s no guarantee that even with the transplant that a pregnancy would be successful; would I even want to take the chance again?
But then there’s the possibility of knowing the feeling of being pregnant again; and that feeling just may overpower all other emotions. To experience pregnancy again, no matter how sick I was during my brief experience, I would give almost anything. The ability to carry my own children and give birth to them is something I have wanted my whole life – and now there are women just like me that may be given the chance.

And then I think, my life wouldn’t be going in the direction I’m headed without that life experience, no matter how terrible it was. I would never want to live through it again, but I know very well that I am a different person now because of it. I appreciate things more, I feel compassionate for others more, and one day when I do have children I will thank God for every second that I have with them.

Moving forward with life, I don’t know what my decision would be if I was presented with the opportunity to have this surgery. I do know, however, that I am completely supportive of the chance for other women to change their ability to carry their own children. Some people ask me, “how could you say that when there are so many children that need adopted in our country?” Well, my answer to that is simple – when the politics are taken out of family planning, this country will not have to worry so much about how many children need to be adopted. If the process for a child to find a home did not involve such lengthy, tiring, and often extremely expensive lengths, I think more children would have permanent homes.

I can speak of this personally, as Jake and I had the opportunity twice to potentially adopt newborns. Both chances were taken away when the birth mother decided to keep her child. In the state of North Carolina, birth mothers are entitled to a length of time in which they may decide to change their minds about giving up their baby. After what we’ve been through, how could anyone in our situation be expected to be given a baby just to have it potentially taken back? We’ve already experienced that once; no thank you.
So to those who may benefit from a uterine transplant –  go for it. Make children the way women were designed to do so instead of the way society deems appropriate. There will still be families who choose to adopt, and there will still be women who choose to give up their babies; these cycles will not be broken by a scientific break through in women’s fertility.

Source: ABC News


2 thoughts on “A little too late

  1. That’s amazing. I guess I’ve never thought about a uterine transplant… not sure why… if you can get a heart transplant, why not a uterus?? That would be amazing for a lot of women.
    I am also in North Carolina. Although my husband and I are not quite to the adoption place yet, and may never be, it’s nice to know that trying to adopt in North Carolina might be more difficult than we imagine. I don’t know anyone who has adopted, so I have no clue about any of it.
    Very interesting post! Thank you!

  2. People ask me all the time why my husband and I don’t look into adoption instead of paying so much for a gestational carrier. I tell that exactly what you said about the birth mother being able to take the baby back. It happened to one of my good friends as well, the baby was home for with them for about 3 days and then taken back by the mom. I agree we have been through enough.
    Thanks for sharing that article. I never thought about the possibility of a uterine transplant.

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